Silanu Hlaalu

"Silanu is a special feature of Gweden" Tsarrina stated proudly. "Not only does she have the largest breasts in all Cyrodiil, but she's the strictest mistress of discipline you'll meet anywhere."

The reporter from the Black Horse Courier was inclined to think that her outfit was one of the wonders of the world, too. It seemed incredible that such thin leather straps could support what they did.

Silanu laughed. "If it's hard to believe, then it's usually magic. A lot of women are using Illusion magic to just make theirs look bigger, but I have a different story to tell."


When I was young, I was jealous of my older sister Falanu. She was getting all the attention from the boys, because her breasts had grown and mine hadn't started.

Do you know my sister? She's an alchemist, and she runs the All Things Alchemical shop in Skingrad. You do? Then you know she's a well-proportioned woman and I had a lot of catching up to do.

It didn't help that she was also a "wild child" in her youth, and way more active than most of her peers, if you know what I mean. I saw how much fun she was having, and I wanted my share. Well, I really wanted more than my share, like my sister was getting, but you get the point.

This was all when we were still living in Morrowind. Dunmer society is quite accepting of its young women playing the field before they're ready to settle down, and Falanu got invited to all the best orgies. I got left at home, because I wasn't big enough for that yet.

I was convinced that "big enough" was a reference to my breasts, not my maturity, so I was determined to do something about it, or them. I persuaded a mage I knew into casting a spell to make them grow. I should have just had her cast an Illusion spell to make them look bigger, but she did an Alteration spell. Perhaps it was so I wouldn't be pestering her for a repeat when it wore off.

Anyhow, they started developing, just as if I was a few years older. And they kept on going. At some point the spell-induced growth stopped, and my own natural growth took over. I ended up with both, and double-sized breasts. Fortunately, the spell had included a Feather effect, so they're no heavier than a normal pair.

Well I did get invited to the orgies once I was bigger, but they found out how young I was and wouldn't let me do any of the fun stuff. That's when I got into whips and teasing and that sort of thing. If I had to say no, I wanted to enjoy doing that. By the time I was old enough to say yes, I was attracting too much attention, and I wanted to say no, to most of them anyway.

When we left Morrowind, we settled on the Red Ring Road and Falanu opened her Alchemy shop there. I had a room in the basement where I could entertain my clients.

They tended to be the well-heeled gentry who had plenty of servants to order around. It seems that that kind of man finds relaxation in handing control to someone else for a time. He's used to getting what he wants, when he wants it, and it's all just too easy. I'm never easy, but I'm well worth the trouble.

One of my regulars was a nobleman by the name of Tertius. He was an illegitimate son, but he didn't know who his father was, or if the first two sons were legitimate or not. He had an untraceable stipend that kept him comfortable, if not in luxury, and wasn't goiing to risk it by trying to find out more about his father.

He was a big healthy man, and I like big. Perhaps because he was so strong and commanding in his regular life, he liked me to spank him. I even had a special riding crop made with a weak shock enchantment, to make it tingle more. We had such fun together, I think I was falling in love with him. Not very professional, but so what?

So one day, he's bent over the chair in my room, I flick the riding crop across his backside, and he keels over dead! I can't believe it. If a man's heart is weak, it's much later in the procedings that he'll have a problem. Besides, Tertius isn't a man with a weak anything.

A man I know only as Tertius' servant comes bursting into the room, screaming that I've killed his master. Falanu is as horrified as I am, and we're all panicking. To make things worse, the servant shows me a letter that was taken from a messenger on his way towards Chorrol, where Tertius lived. It's addressed to the illegitimate son ... of the Emperor!

The servant decides that I need to run away before the Legion Patrol finds out, and tells me I should go back to Morrowind while they try to cover up the crime. Before we know what's going on, the building is on fire, and I'm on a horse galloping up the road towards Cheydinhal, and the Morrowind border, with the servant leading the way. At the border, he sends me off to an address near Silgrad Tower. He turns back the way he'd come and I never see him again.

When the Emperor was assassinated, and the news reached Morrowind, I decided to return. There was obviously a bigger plot going on, and Tertius' death must have been part of it. I found Falanu's new shop in Skingrad and joined her there. Soon after, we had a visit from the Hero of Kvatch, who's now the Champion of Cyrodiil, and the proprietor of this Lodge.

He'd heard I was back in Cyrodiil, and he wanted to meet me. Someone in town had told him to ask Falanu about the large chest, so he had. Falanu sent him up to my room, probably thinking I had a customer.

I showed him the letter, and told him about the events at the old shop. He explained to me that the letter was meant for Martin, not Tertius, and the messenger they'd intercepted was on his way to Weynon Priory to have Brother Jauffre send it on. I could tell that he was intrigued by the story, and he wanted to find out more.

He went to the burned-out shop and found my riding crop, and that convinced him I was telling the truth. It still held a part of its feeble charge, and anyone could tell it wasn't a murder weapon. The fire was a troubling detail too. A blaze attracts attention, not deflects it, so it didn't make sense to do that.

Next he went to Chorrol, to ask about Tertius. There he was attacked by a member of the Mythic Dawn, a man called Eugal Belette. It turned out that he was the one who'd taken over Tertius' house in Chorrol after he died. There was a letter in his basement that tied him in to the plot to kill Tertius, and suggested that the servant I'd met was yet another agent.

Falanu remembered the servant hanging around the well at the old shop whenever Tertius was visiting, so she gave him the key to the well, and he went to take a look. He came back with another letter that proved what had happened, and that I was innocent. Or at least, that the Mythic Dawn was responsible for the murder. It was addressed to the assassin, and told him how he was to bring about Tertius' death.

He'd be in the room with us, under a spell of chameleon, so we couldn't see him. He was to cast a spell on Tertius that drained his health and made him weak to both magicka and shock.That tiny charge on the riding crop would become enough to finish him.

They thought they were killing the Emperor's son, and pinning the blame on me! Anyone could see now that it wasn't true. Except that if I hadn't used the riding crop, Tertius might still be alive. I hate them for that part.

I was still concerned that everyone might think I was part of that Mythic Dawn cult, so I came here to stay out of the way. This is a place that knows how to be discreet.

I still miss Tertius, and there aren't so many nobles to spank this far from the city. But they pay well, so I bring in enough for Tsarrina to let me stay. And I feel so much safer with all the others here. You've already met Prizna, haven't you? She's fought Daedra bare-handed, and bare everything else. How can I be afraid around people like that?


The reporter looked up from his notes. She'd mentioned her sister Falanu quite a bit in this story, and he could see that he'd have to get more detail from her on his way back to the city. He'd met her for the first time on his way to Gweden, and she'd struck him as a little "unusual". Especially some of the things she'd said when he was in her shop. Could Silanu enlighten him a little about what she meant?

Silanu would do that, but it would have to be strictly off the record. Some of the things her sister did weren't exactly legal, even it wasn't quite as big a deal as it would have been back in Morrowind. She'd get together with him later, when he'd finished his report about the Champion, and had more time to spend with her. It could be a long story...